A few years ago, I was in a meeting with my pastor to discuss youth ministry. He was very happy with the direction we were headed and all we had accomplished, but he could sense some frustration in my voice and body language:
“Eric, I sense some frustration coming from you? What’s the matter?” he asked me.
“Well, I mean . . . things are going great. There’s no doubt about that, and I know we’ve improved a lot over the years, but I just don’t get why we don’t have more teens coming,” I responded.
Then he paused, looked at me and said something I’ll never forget:
“Eric, Jesus walked the Earth and only 33% of the world is Christian. How can you expect to do any better? God isn’t calling you to be successful. He’s calling you to be faithful.”
Boom. That was it. My pastor had just given me a spiritual roundhouse kick to my face, and it was the wake up call I needed.
For a long time I had focused so much on the numbers and all the things I was doing in ministry that I neglected to see all the ways God had been moving. To be honest, I had gained a Savior Complex.
I thought that I was the only hope for the teens that came in my door.
I thought that if the teens did not come to my Life Nights on a regular basis then their soul would be in jeopardy.
I thought that I had to say “yes” to everything and keep adding more and more events to reach as many teenagers as possible.
My ministry had become about me, and while my motivation may have been pure, there was one BIG problem: I’m not the Savior.
Now that may not come as a shock to all of you, but I think it’s something many us in youth ministry struggle with. We put the weight of the teens’ salvation on our shoulders, when clearly we were not designed to hold that weight. Salvation comes from Jesus Christ, and maybe we just need to remind ourselves of that when it comes to ministry.
You know why?
You know those teens that come in your door? They can find Jesus in other places too.
You know those teens that refuse to come to your Life Night or Edge Night? Their souls can still be saved.
You know what happens if you say “no” to adding one more event on your schedule? Teens can still get to heaven.
Why?
Because Jesus is the Savior, and “…for God, all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26).
As Youth Ministers we have a vital role to play, and God has called us all to this ministry for very specific reasons. This great responsibility requires that we work as hard as possible, but we need to change the way we look at success. Success is not about the number of teens that come, the number of events that we do, or the number of hours we spend in our office. In ministry being successful, is about being faithful.
Question: How do you define success in youth ministry? (Share below).
Thanks, EPort. This one hit home.
-TBone
Thanks T-Bone!
Great reflection, Eric! Thanks for sharing it!
Thank you Jan!
Thanks Eric! This is a great perspective to look at things as we plan and kick off our new year!
Thanks Chris!
Man this is so true , it just recently hit me .
Amen!
Thank you for sharing this very important reminder.
You’re welcome, Denise. Thank you for the way you serve the youth.
I count success when I find out a group of teens have signed up to be on a leadership team for a service group AND I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT! When a teen signs up to serve on a liturgical ministry AND I WASN’T ASKED HOW TO MAKE IT HAPPEN! When I see adults talking to teens about going to Mass AND THEY AREN’T EVEN ON CORE! Seeing Christ moving in the hearts of teens and adults outside of our ministry is always a humbling moment of knowing that I can plan all I want and tweet all day long but when it comes down to it, God’s going to move with or without me.
Amen Lindsey! Thanks for sharing. God bless you.
I feel success is only found when you can excel at your gifts and close the gaps with people who are good in areas you are not. So a full team effort, everyone in prayer, and letting the spirit guide you where the program should go is success. This is hard to judge. I think a lot of what I do and my core team does is not something you can judge. The youth ministry staff and I will reach out to the youth, talk to them, pray with them, hang with them, visit them in the hospital, go to their sport events or other extra curricular activies, take a teen to a drug rehab, Participate in fundraisers, stueby retreats, parish retreats, sports outings, office hours,Convincing a young teen to keep their babiy verse abortion, outreach, service projects, leadership retreats, Trainings, special events etc. This stuff can’t be judged and its hard to measure. A salesman makes so many sales, a company can make so much in profit. However our youth ministry fruits can touch people in ways we may find out ten years from now or never find out. Getting the moderators of youth program across the world to understand that its not about numbers, well, that is something that we may have a low success rate. This is a sad fact, but we can pray!
Eric this is one of the best articles and will truly touch youth ministers all over the world!
- Mike
Amen! Thanks, Mike. You’re an amazing Youth Minister. Thank you for all the ways you serve teens and the Church.
Thank you, Eric, for putting it into perspective. We do tend to fixate on the numbers, the skits, the whatever it may be. The only thing that matters is that we are walking the talk and by doing that, we reach those who don’t like us or don’t come to the nights.And the ones who do, we reach in a different way. And that’s all the Father wants from us.
God bless!
Amen! Thanks Lisa.
I have only been at the current parish for two months. In that short time, the youth group has grown from 6 “regulars” to 25. This helps please those who are looking for numbers. From talking to the teens though, I have found that they are coming (and bringing friends) because they feel welcome. Because they are asked how they are. Because they are asked what prayers they need. Because someone is taking an interest in their journey with Christ and offering to help them. Because it is not just another activity, but something “filling”.
This being my first full time youth ministry position has really been an eye opener (and I am sure they will open wider). The parents who stop in the office to ask what I did the other night that suddenly their son or daughter begged them to go to mass this week. The men and women who stop and talk with me after mass, thanking me for my presence and asking how they can help. These two parishes are truly incredible.
So answer your question. The success I have felt here is when I hear about teens wanting to go to Mass and begging to go. When I see adults wanting to help the teens grow. When I see a parish wanting to grow ever closer to Him!
Scott,
That is so great to hear! Keep up the great work!
I think the success of youth ministry would be best measured by how many teens are still attending Mass every Sunday, keeping up their prayer life, and abiding by the teachings of the Church one year, two years, five years after they graduate from it. Easy enough to measure (and I think some researchers already have, but I can’t put my hands on studies right now).
Amen!